Let’s Get Real
So, I have a confession. When I was a kid, I was convinced that honey was just a sticky condiment that should be reserved for peanut butter sandwiches and the occasional overly ambitious tea. A “Salted Honey Pie”? What even is that? Like, it sounded like a bizarre art piece you might encounter at a pretentious gallery showing, where the artist declares that the sticky sweetness represents the fragility of childhood dreams crushed by adult responsibilities while the salty notes symbolize the tears of the grown-up world. But here I am — years later — with full acceptance that I’ve been living a lie, because *THIS PIE* is like a hug for your taste buds.
I stumbled upon Salted Honey Pie during one of my late-night recipe-Internet-browsing escapades. You know the scenario: wearing pajamas that have seen better days, with a half-empty pint of ice cream in one hand and a smart device in the other, just scrolling aimlessly through food blogs when I started drooling over the words “sweet,” “salty,” and “pie.” Color me intrigued! After giving it a shot (and maybe a few tweaks of my own because I can’t follow recipes to save my life), I quickly went from hesitant skeptic to the pie’s number one fan.
Now, I can’t stop making it! Seriously, last week, I made enough Salted Honey Pie to feed a small army… or at least my Netflix habit. When my friends thought I was throwing a get-together, they must have been very confused when they realized it was just me wrestling this pie into existence while trying to binge-watch every series on my watch list. But hey, at least my sugar intake was high!
Ingredients, Unfiltered
Let’s break this down ingredient by ingredient, shall we? I’ll go *all out*, and you’ll end up more informed than if you’d taken a course in pieology (not a real thing, but wouldn’t that be the best class ever?):
What’s Really in Salted Honey Pie
Honey: Well, duh. This is the star of the show. I use a high-quality, local honey whenever possible — because let’s be real, you don’t want to gorge on mass-produced honey that tastes as exciting as cardboard. Bonus points if you find some fancy artisanal honey that says things like “honey of the rare wildflower,” which always sounds cooler and makes the pie taste just a smidge more magical. And yes, the amount of honey is entirely how much I can get away with making my dentist cringe.
Granulated Sugar: For those moments when honey just can’t cut through the sweetness levels. Plus, it helps create a nice texture! Honestly, I still side-eye sugar sometimes, but really, it’s a necessary evil when it comes to pie. Plus, it’s 2023, and I refuse to be afraid of sugar anymore. Bring it on!
Eggs: You’ll need three of them, but honestly, I feel like they deserve their own category. These little protein-packed orbs are magical in baking — transforming a gloppy batter into a silky dream. They create the custardy, luscious filling we all know and love. And if I’m not careful, my cat tries to sneak half of them off the counter when I’m not looking. She’s got a thing for omelets, and I can’t blame her!
Heavy Cream: I mean, how could you say no to heavy cream? This is the ingredient that adds that luscious mouthfeel we crave in a pie. What do I enjoy most about heavy cream? The sound it makes as it sloshes around the measuring cup. Is that weird? Maybe, but when it comes to baking, weird is basically my middle name.
Sea Salt: Salty and sweet is the ultimate duo. Remember that epic moment in your life when you tasted the magic of sweet + salty? That’s what we’re trying to achieve here, folks. I reach for sea salt because it sounds fancier, and let’s be honest — flaked salt looks pretty on top of pies. You’ll look like a baking wizard who knows what’s up.
Pie Crust: Make your own, or don’t, I’m not judging. I’ve gone both ways: sometimes I’m feeling like a baking queen, and other days, the frozen crust in the grocery aisle calls my name. For this pie, I typically recommend a simple buttery crust that provides a flaky base for all that gooey goodness. Also, pro tip: I once forgot to take the pie crust out of its tin before baking. It was a disaster.
Let’s Talk Health (or Not)
Is This Even Healthy? Let’s Discuss
Okay, let’s get honest here. Is this a “clean eating” dish? No, not even close. Does it contain **heavy cream**, **sugar**, and **honey**? Yes. But honestly, who even cares in this dessert-driven world? Sure, it’s not health food, but have you ever needed a little sweetness (and saltiness) to eat away the Monday blues? You bet your sweet pie-loving self you have!
Salted Honey Pie is indulgent, and it should be. Here’s the reality: if we could pursue perfection while eating kale all day, life would be a flat snooze. I refuse to feel guilty about the few hundred calories I’m consuming when I can end my day hunched over a slice of this pie, whispering sweet nothings into the crust. Besides, you’re not going to eat the whole pie in one sitting, right? (Don’t answer that — I’ve made more questionable choices.)
Your Grocery List
Here’s What You’ll Need
– 1 ½ cups pie crust (store-bought or homemade)
– 1 cup honey
– ¾ cup granulated sugar
– 3 large eggs
– 1 cup heavy cream
– 1 teaspoon sea salt (plus more for topping)
– 1 tablespoon vanilla extract (optional, but I totally recommend it)
This recipe serves 8 to 10 supper enthusiasts or 1 dedicated pie lover on a “self-care” evening.
The Actual Cooking Part
Okay, Let’s Make This
Alright, grab your apron, and let’s dive into the delicious chaos. Yes, we’re going for a ride, so try not to drown in the excitement.
1. **Preheat the Oven:** First things first, you want your oven preheated to a toasty 350°F (175°C). Kiss your oven goodbye as it warms up; it’s about to do some magical work.
2. **The Crust:** If you’re making your pie crust from scratch (go you!), roll that bad boy out and fit it into your pie plate. If you’re opting for store-bought, plop it right into the dish. Poke some holes with a fork to keep it from puffing up like a balloon. Short crust drama, I’ll tell you!
3. **Blind Bake:** Here’s where it gets real — line your crust with parchment paper and fill it with pie weights or dry beans. Blind bake for about 15-20 minutes until it’s slightly golden. This step is *super important*, unless you want a soggy crust situation — and nobody wants that.
4. **Whisking Time:** In a big mixing bowl, add the **honey**, **sugar**, **eggs**, **heavy cream**, and a pinch of **sea salt**. Break out your whisk, and let the beating commence! Whisk until everything becomes one unified gooey mess. Feel free to channel your inner baker diva while doing this — I know I do!
5. **Pour It Like It’s Hot:** Once that filling is blended to perfection, take your crust out of the oven (carefully, my friend; it’s hot). Pour the filling directly into that crispy, golden crust. This is where the magic happens, so don’t panic if it gets a little messy. I mean, baking chaos is part of the charm, right?
6. **Bake Again:** Place your pie in the oven! Bake for 30-40 minutes until the filling is set but still quivers slightly (you know, like that friend who says they’re fine but are actually a total wreck). The center should be fully cooked, but the edges are caramelized to perfection.
7. **Chill Out:** Allow the pie to cool for an hour at room temperature, and then refrigerate for about 2-4 hours (or overnight, if you’re blessed with patience). This step allows the filling to set into a delicious custard-like texture. It’s like pie yoga, giving it a moment to relax and zen out.
8. **Serve It Up:** When you’re ready to eat, sprinkle some flaky sea salt on top — a balancing act of flavors that’ll make you feel like a culinary genius. Slice it up, serve it on your favorite dessert plates, and try not to swoon over the glory that is your homemade Salted Honey Pie.
Side Notes & Sassy Hacks
Bonus Tips You Didn’t Ask For
– If you’re not feeling honey (highly debatable but I won’t judge), you could swap for maple syrup. Just know that this will take the flavor in a whole new direction.
– Leftovers? What leftovers? But if you happen to have some pie lying around (so impressive!), store it in the fridge covered with plastic wrap. And guess what? This pie actually tastes even better after a day or two when the flavors marry. You might even catch me wrestling with this beauty at 2 AM.
– Want to get all fancy? Top with whipped cream or a scoop of vanilla ice cream before serving. (Make sure to whip that cream like you’ve got something to prove. And literally speaking, you might — it’ll make you feel fancy).
Final Words of (Culinary) Wisdom
So there you have it — my unapologetic love letter to the most delicious pie ever created. If you try it, tag me or just send me a mental high-five. I know you’re going to love it as much as I do. And who knows? Maybe this Salted Honey Pie will be the special star at all your future gatherings, stealing hearts and stomachs alike. It could even become your kryptonite just like it is for me! Let’s embrace the sweet and salty chaos together! And remember, in the big, bad world of pies, you’re the boss!
